How I Went From Rule-Follower to Rebel

30 Jun How I Went From Rule-Follower to Rebel

I haven’t always been a Rebel.

In fact, for the vast majority of my life I was a rule-follower extraordinaire. I always wanted to do things the “right” way. Especially when it came to school. Give me a rubric and I would follow it like GPS directions all the way to an A+ every. single. time.

Other kids would tease me by calling me a teacher’s pet, thinking it would get under my skin, but I wore that label around like a badge of honour.

Valedictorian? Check. Honour roll? Check. Dean’s list? Check.

I had accolades coming out the wazoo from elementary school allll the way up until I graduated from university, when I landed my first “real” job working in the marketing industry (the field I’d studied in school).

Following the rules sure paid off.

I continued my rule-abiding ways at my shiny, new job, following every process and procedure to a T—all with a big, eager smile on my face.

And supposedly “good” things started to happen. I was being recognized by my bosses for my hard work, assigned to bigger client accounts and projects, and given a promotion and steady raises.

I was doing e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g right, and yet I was deeply unhappy. And I couldn’t understand why.

After all, I was following the exact same guidelines I had my entire life with great success: receive criteria of expectations → follow expectations → get reward → feel happy. 

So I thought, “Maybe it’s just a phase? Maybe I’m just not used to the whole working adult thing yet? Maybe that’s why I’m not satisfied with these so-called fruits of my labour?”

But after a year and a half in that job, I finally came to terms with the fact that it was not a phase. No matter what I did right, what I received in exchange was not what I wanted.

I began to resent praise and pay bumps, because they were often followed closely by work and responsibilities that I knew would drive me deeper into my pit of depression.

So I went searching for career happiness and fulfillment elsewhere—in other roles, at other companies, in other industries. Spoiler alert: I didn’t find it.

What I did was spend the next five years bouncing from job to job to job, where I would rinse and repeat the same cycle of being a model employee and doing all. the. things. I was supposed to do, only to end up buried under the weight of work I wanted nothing to do with.

It wasn’t until my very last job working in corporate when I had the AHA moment. When I finally realized that while following the rules was getting me far, and helping me check off all of the boxes of what “success” should look like, it wasn’t getting me to where I wanted to go in my life. And it certainly wasn’t making me happy.

That’s when my rebellious nature was born. That’s when I decided that instead of continuing to follow the rules set out by society, I was going to create my own.

As someone who had spent their entire life up to then perfecting the art of conforming to others’ expectations, abandoning all those “shoulds” felt terrifying.

But I also knew that doing things my way was the ONLY way I would ever be happy. It was the only way I’d ever achieve all of the dreams I had for my life.

I had to stop seeking permission from others to live the big, bold life I’d envisioned for myself—I had to give that permission to myself.

And I did. On June 2, 2017, my last day of working in corporate, I signed my own damn permission slip to create an unconventional career that would allow me to live my life on my own terms. And I haven’t looked back since.

You see, some rebels are born at birth. But others, like me, are born as a result of their circumstances. Which kind of rebel are you? When did you first notice your rebellious tendencies, and how do they show up in your life?